I have a confession to make. For a long time, I thought that shy guys were extremely boring creatures. So, whenever a shy guy asked me on a date, I would make an excuse only to avoid “the torture” of going out with one.
And then it struck me. I realized how foolish I was for not giving shy guys a chance because, let’s be honest, everyone deserves a chance (except players, of course).
My first date with a shy guy was unexpectedly awesome. Okay, it was a little bit awkward for the first few minutes, but later on, everything felt so refreshing and fun. I didn’t need to be convinced to go on a second or third date because I REALLY wanted to and enjoyed every single minute of it.
Today I feel it’s my holy duty to spread the word about shy guys being true undiscovered gems!
They might not talk much, but when they do, they can make you laugh with just a few wisely chosen words.
Their mysterious aura is something so addictive, and it makes them irresistible to be around.
Dating a shy guy has so many benefits, but I would be a liar if I told you that you wouldn’t face any challenges.
It’s hard to decipher if a shy guy likes you, and it takes a lot of time and effort to help them open up to you.
Another tricky thing is differentiating a shy guy from a player (because players can be really sneaky). BUT, not all hope is lost!
If you’re thinking about dating a shy guy (or you’re already dating one), here’s everything you need to know about them!
Is he a player (in disguise) or a genuinely nice guy who is just shy?
It’s difficult to differentiate between a shy guy and a legit player because they have one thing in common: They both give mixed signals.
Let’s say that you meet a nice guy and notice that he has difficulty opening up to you. If he’s a player, he could easily pretend that he has trust issues or that he’s a shy guy who needs more time to feel comfortable around you.
Or he could be a genuinely nice guy who is just shy. It’s hard to decipher their intentions and make valid conclusions about their personality.
But there are some things that are specific to every shy guy out there. If you notice that he’s doing these things, know that these are legit signs you are dealing with a shy guy (and not a player):
• He prefers texting over calling
• He doesn’t tell you much about himself (in the beginning)
• He doesn’t enjoy public displays of affection too much
• He’s a true gentleman
• He puts a lot of effort into being romantic in his own way
Remember that shy guys aren’t like other guys out there. They have a specific personality and require time and patience to get to know them better.
At first, you might think that they aren’t interested in you because they have difficulty showing their.
But, after some time, you will realize how intriguing their mindset really is.
How to know if a shy guy likes you?
Another challenging task when it comes to shy guys is how to know whether they like you or not. Indeed, how do you know that they are interested in you when they are not really showing it and not saying it to you?
I’m too afraid to imagine how many romances failed before they even started because a girl couldn’t read between the lines and realize that a shy guy liked her.
That can be frustrating for both shy guys and their potential girls. So, how can you know if a shy guy likes you?
The easiest way to understand what is going in their heads is to pay attention to their body language and these signs a shy guy likes you:
• He looks at you A LOT (when you’re not looking)
• He has difficulty creating meaningful sentences in your presence
• He’s extra clumsy around you
• He goes out of his way to please you (and be at your service)
• He listens to you carefully
• He showers you with likes on social media
• His friends tease him about having (a secret) crush on you
• He tries hard to impress you
• He has difficulty locking eyes with you
There are lots of other signs a shy guy likes you, but these are the most common ones, so make sure to pay close attention to them.
Now, if you’re having second thoughts about whether you should date a shy guy (or not), here is my humble experience with shy guys.
If you ask me, shy guys are the new hot!
I’ve had my fair share of dealing with players and other types of toxic men, so maybe that’s the main reason why I’m a firm believer that shy guys are the new hot. Whatever it be, I know that I’ll never look at them the same way I used to.
If you’re still a little bit skeptical about the nature of shy guys (like the old me), I’ll do my best to explain their peculiar personality in detail.
At first, you might think that there’s nothing interesting going on in their minds, and spending time with them equals ultimate boredom. After some time, you will realize how mysterious, humble, and down to earth they are.
It’s truly impressive how their minds work and how they always manage to say the right thing at the right time.
There’s nothing more exciting in the whole world than revealing their enigmatic personalities bit by bit. There is so much you can learn from them and about them, trust me on this.
So, if you ask me, shy guys are DEFINITELY the new hot. Their inspiring perspectives and enticing personalities are things that can capture any girl’s heart, only if she decides to give them a chance. So, will you give him a chance?
If you will, here are some things you should keep in mind when dating a shy guy:
• Focus on asking him open-ended questions.
If you ask a shy guy questions that can be answered with a simple “Yes” or “No,” you will not establish meaningful communication with him. Instead, focus on asking him interesting open-ended questions. These questions can be about shared interests, things he likes, his childhood, hobbies, etc.
• Find some common interests.
The easiest way to bond with a shy guy is by finding common interests (I’ve realized this the hard way). Think about all the things that you could have in common. It could be anything from your favorite sweets to movies.
Remember, the goal is to find one thing that you’re both passionate about because this will tell a shy guy that you’re just like him (well, to a certain extent).
• Stick to his preferred method of communication.
No shy guy ever would be pleased with talking to you over the phone. Mostly, their preferred method of communication is via text, so you should stick to it. Don’t force him to call or, God forbid, video call you because this could make him feel uncomfortable and scared.
• Don’t rush introducing him to your friends and family.
You shouldn’t rush with introducing a shy guy to your friends and family because that might scare him off. Keep in mind that meeting new people is a real challenge for them because they have difficulties opening up.
Trying to impress your friends and parents and at the same time dealing with their anxious thoughts could be draining for them.
• The GOLDEN RULE of dating a shy guy: Always give him enough space.
Shy guys need their space more than anything in the world. Don’t force them to talk to you when you see that they’re not interested in it at that moment. Don’t force them to do anything if you know that they’re not comfortable with it.
That’s the golden rule when it comes to mastering the art of dating a shy guy.
• Don’t pressure him to open up to you.
If you think that pressuring a shy guy will help him open up to you, think again. The only outcome of pressuring him will be scaring him off.
Shy guys need time to feel comfortable sharing things with you, and once they become comfy around you, they will let you into their magical world. Also, they will be grateful for you giving them time to sort out their feelings.
• NEVER share things he tells you in confidence.
Once you betray a shy guy’s trust, the game is over, and I truly mean it. Earning their trust and helping them open up to you is a challenge in itself.
So, if they find out that what they’ve told you in secret has been shared with other people, they will instantly become reserved again. Be smart and never share things he tells you in confidence (this applies to other non-shy people as well).
“I can’t take my eyes off you unless, of course, you notice me. Then I’ll quickly look away and act like it never happened.” – Unknown
Chances are high that a shy guy wrote this quote.
So, the question is: Will you let a shy guy secretly admire you while slowly dying to tell you how much he likes you?
Or will you take the initiative and encourage him to open up to you?