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How To Let Go Of Everything: 12 Secrets To Ultimate Freedom

How To Let Go Of Everything: 12 Secrets To Ultimate Freedom

Since there’s no point in asking you how many times you wished you could let go of everything, I’ll start with the following:

How many times have you found yourself thinking that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence?

How many times have you been jealous of someone having something you don’t, blamed others, or had regrets about something you should’ve or shouldn’t have done? 

I bet one too many. Because we’re human beings and it’s in our nature to yearn for something we don’t have, to blame others when things go wrong, and to blame ourselves for lack of courage. 

We get scarred by painful experiences, we witness our loved ones hurt us, and we spend half of our lives in the healing process.

Even though we know there’s no point in torturing ourselves, we still have a hard time letting it all go.

Instead of living in the moment – focusing on what’s in front of us and the vast possibilities and opportunities – we choose to fight the battles we already lost.

We choose to try hard to change things that cannot be changed but only accepted.

And that is the beauty of letting go

When something bothers you and you don’t let it go, it haunts you and becomes a part of your everyday life.

It prevents you from fully experiencing the present moment and putting your needs, well-being, and happiness in first place

“Some people believe holding on and hanging in there are signs of great strength.

However, there are times when it takes much more strength to know when to let go and then do it.” – Ann Lander 

Letting go of attachments and stepping out of your comfort zone are some of the hardest things you’ll ever do in life, but also of the bravest and necessary for your personal development (and emotional self-care).

You could spend half of your life waiting for things to change, only to realize that you weren’t waiting but wasting your precious time. To live means to cry, laugh, curse, dance, but it also means to LET GO.

Begging, waiting, and contemplating are the biggest enemies of true happiness and reaching of your true potential, whereas the process of letting go is the only path to ultimate freedom and easier life!

This path requires you to let go of EVERYTHING in order to achieve ANYTHING

1. Letting go of addictive attachments

Human beings are wired to connect with a wide variety of “things,” from people to objects. We fall in love with our eyes and we fall in love with other people’s quirks and flaws.

We fall in love with medications, drugs, remedies, clothes, and shoes that make us feel better. 

When we’re crazy about something or someone, we tend to spend the majority of our time dreaming about it. We daydream about how it would feel to kiss that one person and feel the warmth of their arms around us.

If we don’t own that one object of our desire, we daydream of the moment we’ll finally win it or buy it.

We get convinced that being with that one person or having that one object is exactly what we are missing in life. We think that these are the key to reaching true happiness. 

When we’re experiencing unrequited love or spending as much time as possible with the object of our desire, we develop addictive attachments. 

By only focusing on that one thing, we neglect other aspects of our life because we think that without it, we’d feel miserable.

The truth is, we get addicted to persons and things because we’re trying to fill a void – to compensate for something that we lack deep inside our soul. 

Letting go of addictive attachments is a self-care method that will give you enough space and time to think about what it is that you’re truly missing.

It will help you find true happiness within yourself, because that’s the only place where you can find it.

2. Letting go of consuming desires

How often have you stared at that one piece of clothing in a store and contemplated whether to buy it or not. Even though deep down in your soul you know you don’t need it, you still buy it. Why?

Because you WANT it. You want that one cool T-shirt, pants, pair of shoes, dress, mascara, you name it. And the accent is on wanting it, aka desiring it. 

Our desires often trick us into believing we need a certain thing and without it, we’ll never be happy.

Modern media is subtly sending us messages that we’ll never be pretty if we don’t buy that one lipstick that’s been advertised by celebs or models.

Or if you don’t buy that magical pan advertised on TV, you’ll feel miserable for the rest of your life cooking with a regular pan. And that’s when our desires kick in!

We start wanting and desiring all these things, even though we don’t need the majority of them. Our consuming nature enslaves us to believe the only path to feeling content is that of excessive buying. 

Instead of being in control of what we want and need, we let desires control us. And that’s when they become toxic. So letting go of them is one of the necessary steps to experiencing ultimate freedom!

See also: What Is True Happiness (And The Secrets To Attaining It)

3. Letting go of judgment

Judging other people has become a trending hobby in our society. By judging, I don’t only mean judging other people’s decisions – there is so much more to it.

Judgment includes being angry, constant gossiping, complaining about things, and so on. To judge basically means to be constantly on the lookout for every imperfection and flaw.

It is one of the most toxic things in the whole world!

Now, the question is: Why do we do it? And the answer is: Because we expect too much from people and/or because we want to be in control. 

If someone does something wrong, we judge them, even though it has nothing to do with us. When we’re talking about other people, we’re passively expressing our desire to be in control. 

We want to change everything around us to the way we want and think is right. But, we forget that judging, gossiping, and constant complaining will not change a thing. 

We forget that we’re not in a position to judge others because we don’t know what’s exactly going on in their minds and lives.

The only person we can change is ourselves, and that’s why we shouldn’t (only) focus on changing others.

A piece of helpful advice is always welcome, but judging is something we should avoid for the sake of the well-being of both ourselves and others.

4. Letting go of unrealistic expectations

You know that your partner is a total non-romantic yet you still expect them to shower you with grand romantic gestures. And when they don’t, you get offended and disappointed.

You expect people to say what you really want to hear, you want them to value the same things as you, and you count on them behaving in a certain way. When they don’t, you start feeling mad, angry, and betrayed.

But, is it really realistic to expect all that? 

Of course not. Having unrealistic expectations of our loved ones, friends, or family members means constantly expecting them to do and say everything we want them to. The operative word here is unrealistic.

It’s time to open your eyes and develop reasonable expectations instead of unrealistic ones. It will save you tons of nerves, time, and trouble.

When you know that what you’re expecting of others is reasonable, then chances are your expectations will be met.

Letting go of unrealistic expectations means saving yourself from that delusional world you’ve been stuck in for a while now. It means creating a new one where you welcome freedom and get rid of living in a fantasy!

5. Letting go of the past

To let go of the past means to let go of the things you cannot change. Everything you’ve said or done, your tears, happy moments and less happy ones all belong to the past.

Your heartbreaks, disappointments, pain, and various hardships happened for a reason. They’ve shaped you into the person you are today. You’ve become bolder, stronger, and wiser. 

So, thinking about the past and wanting to change it means wanting to change yourself. And that’s not possible. Nothing in life happens by chance and you are exactly where you need to be at this very moment.

Contemplating the past or worrying about the future is preventing you from living your life to the fullest and enjoying every second of your precious time. 

To let go of the past sometimes means to let go of someone you love, which is not an easy thing to do. But, it’s necessary.

Let go of him if you know that he took you for granted and couldn’t make you happy. Let go of her if you know she’s not the right one for you. 

When you let go of all the things that prevent you from enjoying the present, you’ll let go of a huge burden that prevented you from learning to fly into the future.

6. Letting go of the need to be in control

If I’ve learned one thing during my humble life, it is the following: Life is uncertain. It’s full of ups and downs, and you never know what will happen next.

You can plan everything in detail, but chances are that life will disrupt all you’ve planned.

Why? Because nothing in life is constant. Every second, minute, hour, and day, there are thousands and thousands of major and minor changes that we’re often unaware of.

Every single change, however big or small, influences the outcome of our plans and brings you closer to spiritual awakening

The sad truth is we’re not in control of anything, so letting go of the need to be in control of everything is the only cure.

We cannot control what will happen at our job, in our relationship, with our family, and so on. We can only adapt, find a silver lining, and believe that everything that’s going on is happening for a reason.

When we understand all that, our life becomes so much easier. 

See also: The Ultimate Guide To Letting Go Of Someone You Love

7. Letting go of plans and goals

It’s true that having plans and goals is a sign of determination and strength, and a recipe for success. But, sometimes they prevent us from one important thing: Living in the moment.

When we solely focus on all the plans and life goals we want to achieve in the future, we often forget to embrace the present.

We lose ourselves in constant daydreaming about what will happen and forget to be grateful for the things that already have taken place.

In order to start living in the moment, be grateful for everything you already have and create positive vibes. Sometimes, you need to let go of the desire to achieve more. 

And I’m not saying that you need to let go of it for good, but for a certain period of time so that you recharge yourself and refresh your perspective.

Remember that happiness is not about having everything you want, but about embracing everything you already have in life.

8. Letting go of pain

When we are hurt by someone in one way or another, it’s natural to feel pain. We hate everyone around us, lock ourselves in our den, and watch Netflix for hours while binge eating ice cream and cursing our destiny.

And that’s totally okay because it’s a part of the healing process.

But, if we’re constantly reminding ourselves of what someone has done to us and reliving it on repeat, we’re deliberately depriving ourselves of freedom and happiness. 

Holding grudges for an eternity in the hopes that one day you’ll repay the hurt they caused you is extremely toxic for our self-esteem and overall well-being.

Letting go of pain means finding the courage to let go of the things you cannot change. You cannot change what happened, but you can change how you’ll react to it.

Finding your inner peace and learning to forgive others and yourself is a true blessing.

9. Letting go of the future

Letting go of the future is not only about letting go of plans and goals – it is so much more. It’s also about letting go of all the worry and anxious thoughts about future events.

When we’re constantly expecting something bad to happen in the future, we get frozen in our own body and cannot act. Overthinking is one of the biggest enemies of every human being.

It’s when you’re convinced that you’re bound to fail before you even tried anything. You might avoid public speeches and similar because you’re convinced everyone would laugh at you.

Or you might incessantly worry about irrelevant things you yourself know will never happen to you.

If you want to let go of everything, you need to let go of your fears of failure and overthinking, and quit taking yourself for granted.

You’re an amazing human being; it would be a waste not to unlock your full potential. And the only way to do that is to believe in yourself, instead of thinking about what might happen. 

10. Letting go of comparing

Do you often catch yourself comparing yourself to a prettier girl or guy? Or thinking that the grass is greener on the other side?

Just like judging, comparing is also deeply rooted into our beings. We constantly think that someone else is smarter, prettier, and more capable than us.

By focusing on other people, we forget to praise our own uniqueness.

Just because someone else has something you don’t, this doesn’t mean you should feel less worthy for not having the exact same thing. Owning things is not what makes us happy! 

The definition of freedom and happiness is in our heads. It is not in the things around us, so it’s high time we stop comparing each other and wishing to be something we’re not. 

Every single one of us has our own imperfections and that is exactly what makes us distinctly unique and special.

Just because some of your friends are in a relationship and you’re still single, this doesn’t mean you’ll be forever single.

We all have our unique path to walk, so comparing ourselves with others is just a waste of time. Letting go of the need to be like others and have things that others do is the only way to discovering your true self.

See also: 15 Days Forgiveness Challenge: The Ultimate Way To Move On And Let Go

11. Letting go of anger

Anger is one of the most powerful emotions, capable of destroying our once healthy relationships, jobs, and entire life. This emotion is often responsible for our acting on impulse. 

When we’re feeling angry and bitter, we tend to say and do things we normally wouldn’t. We let this toxic emotion penetrate our being, and when we do that, it is only a matter of time before it bursts. 

Instead of only focusing on negative emotions, we need to concentrate on how we can change the situation and improve things. Yelling or fighting always makes things worse, but we’re often not aware of that.

Letting go of anger means not letting this toxic emotion enter your system and disrupt how you function. It means protecting yourself from negative outcomes and focusing on what you can do in the moment.

And if there’s nothing you can do about it, then just let go of everything. Let go of anger; let go of trying to make things right.

Because some things are not meant to be right – they are meant to be forgiven and forgotten.

12. Letting go of fear

Fear is another powerful emotion that can prevent us from reaching our full potential. The truth is we spend nearly half of our life worrying about things. 

We fear the unknown, we fear change, we fear our decisions. We basically fear fear. When we have no influence over certain things, we immediately enter the realm of fear. 

We become overly worried about all the possible outcomes. And sometimes we don’t even try doing anything because we fear failure. 

Letting go of fear means accepting things and doing your best every single day.

When you know that you’re trying your best and making a serious effort in every aspect of your life, then there’s nothing you should worry about.

All you need to do to let go of fear is to embrace all the challenges on the journey called life. And there will be plenty of them, but this doesn’t mean you should be afraid of them.

Letting go of fear means knowing you’re doing your best and being prepared for the worst. Feeling free is about believing instead of fearing.

When you go through life like a warrior, you don’t fear battles or pain. You see everything as an opportunity to evolve.

To help you kickstart the process, here are some inspiring quotes about letting go:

61 Letting Go Quotes To Help You Unlock Ultimate Freedom

1. “The beautiful journey of today can only begin when we learn to let go of yesterday.” – Steve Maraboli

2. “Today expect something good to happen to you no matter what occurred yesterday. Realize the past no longer holds you captive. It can only continue to hurt you if you hold on to it. Let the past go. A simply abundant world awaits.” – Sarah Breathnach

3. “The truth was, he now belonged only to my past, and it was time I begin to accept it, as much as it hurt to do so.” – Tammara Webber

4. “Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” – Lao Tzu

5. “Never waste valuable time, or mental peace of mind, on the affairs of others – that is too high a price to pay.” – Robert Greene

6. “The greatest step towards a life of simplicity is to learn to let go.” – Steve Maraboli

7. “Inner peace can be reached only when we practice forgiveness. Forgiveness is letting go of the past, and is therefore the means for correcting our misperceptions.” – Gerald G. Jampolsky

8. “Let go of certainty. The opposite isn’t uncertainty. It’s openness, curiosity, and a willingness to embrace paradox, rather than choose up sides. The ultimate challenge is to accept ourselves exactly as we are, but never stop trying to learn and grow.” – Tony Schwartz

9. “Detachment means letting go and nonattachment means simply letting be.” – Stephen Levine

10. “Pain will leave you, when you let go” – Jeremy Aldana

11. “If you want to forget something or someone, never hate it, or never hate him/her. Everything and everyone that you hate is engraved upon your heart; if you want to let go of something, if you want to forget, you cannot hate.” – C. JoyBell C.

12. “A rational person can find peace by cultivating indifference to things outside of their control.” – Naval Ravikant

13. “Letting go doesn’t mean that you don’t care about someone anymore. It’s just realizing that the only person you really have control over is yourself.” – Deborah Reber

14. “We can’t be afraid of change. You may feel very secure in the pond that you are in, but if you never venture out of it, you will never know that there is such a thing as an ocean, a sea. Holding onto something that is good for you now, may be the very reason why you don’t have something better.” – C. JoyBell C.

15. “Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don’t.” – Steve Maraboli

16. “It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all, in which case you have failed by default.” – J. K. Rowling

17. “Let go of becoming but never let go of taking action. Stop expecting and start living.” – Maxime Lagacé

18. “Letting go isn’t a one-time thing, it’s something you have to do every day, over and over again.” – Dawson’s Creek

19. “If you want to fly in the sky, you need to leave the earth. If you want to move forward, you need to let go of the past that drags you down.” – Amit Ray

20. “The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.” – Steve Maraboli

21. “If you truly want to be respected by people you love, you must prove to them that you can survive without them.” – Michael Bassey Johnson

22. “Learning to let go should be learned before learning to get. Life should be touched, not strangled. You’ve got to relax, let it happen at times, and at others move forward with it. It’s like boats. You keep your motor on so you can steer with the current. And when you hear the sound of the waterfall coming nearer and nearer, tidy up the boat, put on your best tie and hat, and smoke a cigar right up till the moment you go over. That’s a triumph.” – Ray Bradbury

23. “Become comfortable with not knowing.” – Eckhart Tolle

24. “Renew, release, let go. Yesterday’s gone. There’s nothing you can do to bring it back. You can’t ‘should’ve’ done something. You can only DO something. Renew yourself. Release that attachment. Today is a new day!” – Steve Maraboli

25. “The day I understood everything, was the day I stopped trying to figure everything out. The day I knew peace was the day I let everything go.” – C. JoyBell C.

26. “The only thing a person can ever really do is keep moving forward. Take that big leap forward without hesitation, without once looking back. Simply forget the past and forge toward the future.” – Alyson Noel

27. “When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.” – Catherine Ponder

28. “Choose the non-emotional response to any given situation and see how much easier your life becomes.” – Naval Ravikant

29. “To let go does not mean to get rid of. To let go means to let be. When we let be with compassion, things come and go on their own.” – Jack Kornfield

30. “You can’t possibly embrace that new relationship, that new companion, that new career, that new friendship, or that new life you want, while you’re still holding on to the baggage of the last one. Let go… and allow yourself to embrace what is waiting for you right at your feet.” – Steve Maraboli

31. “When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.” – Lao Tzu

32. “To love and let go, love and let go, love and let go… It’s the single most important thing we can learn in this lifetime.” – Rachel Brathen

33. “The way of love is the way of no-expectation. Love exists only when there is a total acceptance and no desire to change anything.” – Osho

34. “…when you let go of your expectations, when you accept life as it is, you’re free. To hold on is to be serious and uptight. To let go is to lighten up.” – Richard Carlson

35. “Let go of the battle. Breathe quietly and let it be. Let your body relax and your heart soften. Open to whatever you experience without fighting.” – Jack Kornfield

36. “Know that everything is in perfect order whether you understand it or not.” – Valery Satterwhite

37. “Practice giving things away, not just things you don’t care about, but things you do like. Remember, it is not the size of a gift, it is its quality and the amount of mental attachment you overcome that count. So don’t bankrupt yourself on a momentary positive impulse, only to regret it later. Give thought to giving. Give small things, carefully, and observe the mental processes going along with the act of releasing the little thing you liked.” – Huston Smith

38. “I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become.” – Carl Jung

39. “It’s effortless to let go of self-absorbed people. It’s challenging to let go of someone you care about and it’s exceedingly difficult to let go of an ideal and a belief in someone because what exacerbates the disappointment of finding out they weren’t who they presented themselves to be, is the betrayal of it.” – Donna Lynn Hope

40. “Life moves on and so should we.” – Spencer Johnson

41. “You can meet someone who’s just right, but he might not be meant for you. You break up, you lose things, you never feel the same again. But maybe you should stop questioning why. Maybe you should just accept it and move on.” – Winna Efendi

42. “Are you going to allow the world around you to change while you remain stagnant? Make this the time you throw away old habits that have hindered your happiness and success and finally allow your greatest self to flourish.” – Steve Maraboli

43. “What happens when you let go, when your strength leaves you and you sink into darkness, when there’s nothing that you or anyone else can do, no matter how desperate you are, no matter how you try? Perhaps it’s then, when you have neither pride nor power, that you are saved, brought to an unimaginably great reward.” – Mark Halperin

44. “Take a step back and realize most things are distractions.” – Maxime Lagacé

45. “Whatever comes, let it come, what stays let stay, what goes let go.” – Papaji

46. “There is beauty all around us, and the light finds us when we realize we are all part of that beauty and worth the cherishing. If we despise any, we journey to despise ourselves. See all as beautiful, even if they choose to see themselves through you, as being less than so. We have the power to see for each, and be the reflection of what they may yet see.” – Tom Althouse

47. “Quitting is not giving up, it’s choosing to focus your attention on something more important. Quitting is not losing confidence, it’s realizing that there are more valuable ways you can spend your time. Quitting is not making excuses, it’s learning to be more productive, efficient and effective instead. Quitting is letting go of things (or people) that are sucking the life out of you so you can do more things that will bring you strength.” – Osayi Osar-Emokpae

48. “One’s doing well if age improves even slightly one’s capacity to hold on to that vital truism: ‘This too shall pass.’” – Alain de Botton

49. “It is not the actions of others which trouble us (for those actions are controlled by their governing part), but rather it is our own judgments. Therefore remove those judgments and resolve to let go of your anger, and it will already be gone. How do you let go? By realizing that such actions are not shameful to you.” – Marcus Aurelius

50. “Convince yourself every day that you are worthy of a good life. Let go of stress, breathe. Stay positive, all is well.”  – Germany Kent

51. “Letting go of someone we love is the hardest thing we will ever do. Some people never surrender to love for the fear of being hurt. But to not have loved, to not have felt the immense joy it brings, would have been a far worse kind of death.”  – Goldie Hawn

52. “Don’t seek, don’t search, don’t ask, don’t knock, don’t demand – relax.” – Osho

53. “Dare to live by letting go.”  – Tom Althouse

54. “Let go and go beyond living the dream, by dreaming the reality, into a reality beyond the dream.” – Tom Althouse

55. “As an empath, it’s vital that you learn how to hold space for your emotions, even the most painful ones. By anchoring yourself in your breath, you can learn how to witness the emotional energy of others within you, without attaching yourself to these sensations.” – Mateo Sol

56. “More and more obstacles seem to be other people’s issues that form in the way of a hand to block one, to take notice of them? Sometimes noticing ahead of time, and taking the time to notice them, makes the hand part of an arm that embraces you. The obstacles become bridges for both to cross over, even if in opposite directions.” – Tom Althouse

57. “Things sometimes go our way and sometimes they don’t. All we can do is apply ourselves to our profession, giving our very best effort but emotionally letting go of the outcome. Why? Because if we obsess about an outcome, we cannot possibly honour the present moment.” – Christopher Dines

58. “In the Chinese metaphysical tradition this is termed wu-hsin or ‘idealness’, signifying a state of consciousness in which one simply accepts experiences as they come without interfering with them on the one hand or identifying oneself with them on the other. One does not judge them, form theories about them, try to control them, or attempt to change their nature in any way; one lets them be free to be just exactly what they are. ‘The perfect man’, said Chuang-tzu, ’employs his mind as a mirror; it grasps nothing, it refuses nothing, it receives but does not keep.’”  – Alan W. Watts

59. “Just keep in mind: the more we value things outside our control, the less control we have.” – Epictetus

60. “Yet will and power cannot exist alongside one another. Motivation does not come into question when you surrender fully into the present moment. Motivation to do, to take action, to make moves, comes naturally from this surrender.” – Kelly Martin

61. “The sooner we heal our traumas, the sooner we liberate ourselves from the people who hurt us. By hating them, we hold onto them. We cannot heal.” – Vironika Tugaleva

Letting Go Of Everything Means Finding Yourself!

You can’t stop thinking about too many What ifs – about your past bad relationships, other people’s opinions, and what will happen next.

While drowning in the dark abyss of your mind, you secretly wish to let go of everything. 

You want to let go of emotional pain that has accumulated in your mind and body. You hope to let go of anger and the toxic spectrum of negative emotions.

You wish you had a new life devoid of pain, struggle, and regret. 

And I used to wish the same things as you. Half of my life I was dwelling in the past and contemplating the future without even knowing it. 

I didn’t realize that letting go of fear, anger, comparing, addictive attachments, consuming desires and other things mentioned above means giving yourself space and time to find your true self.

There are so many things in life that prevent us from unlocking our true potential and that’s why it’s necessary to let go of them.

The more I focused on figuring out what I could have done differently in the past, the more confused and lost I felt.

I used to see the past as something that needs to be explained, so I was reliving it in my head again and again. 

And the future was something I feared, so I thought if I prepared myself for every possible outcome, I’d avoid disappointments. And boy, was I wrong.

By focusing on things that were draining me, I deliberately deprived myself of freedom. But, now I understand that life is a true miracle and it would be a shame if you wasted it on incessant worrying, judging, or comparing.

Now I understand that I needed to let go of everything in order to achieve everything!

See also: Be Strong Enough To Let Go Of Whatever Makes You Unhappy